A Metanoia Anniversary pt 17

 

The News of my death is greatly exaggerated"

- Mark Twain

meta -naoia

: a transformative change of heart, a new perspective, turning point, 

"He not busy being born is busy dying"

- Bob Dylan, It's Alright Ma

"Where your treasure is , there is your heart also."

- Matt 6:212

"Since the invention of the kiss, there have been five kisses

that were rated the most passionate, the most pure. This one

left them all behind."

- The Princess Bride

Inspiration :

The ride had been mostly a mostly gentle sail.

Many days of letting wind and waves carry this

vessel availing this sailor to the ascent to peace.

Moments of fierce storms soon arrived shifting

me of course and the task of getting back 

was almost impossible. Faith and courage waned as

the journey seemed out of control .Then the big knock

down arrived.The cardiologist said "You need heart surgery."

On Thursday July 31, 2008 , the Feast of St. Ignatius of Loyola, I 

found myself at a noon mass at a local Jesuit Retreat House.

Spartan attendance was the norm for these liturgies but on

this day the small chapel was filled to leaving many in attendance

standing. Fr. Gerry , the celebrant, informed the gathered believers

that I was scheduled to have open heart surgery on Monday August 4 . 

A great gasp echoed throughout. Gerry then invited everyone to 

participate in the Sacrament of  Healing for me by laying hands 

on me in prayer. Humility and gratitude grew. 

The blessings began. My tears flowed like an underserved

prodigal.

While departing the chapel the Jesuit guru of the house,Fr. Tom,

 satat the exit-way grabbing me gently whispering into my ear

"You know, I heard that this works."

The following Monday waiting with palms perspiring 

in pre-surgery the surgeon invited Ginny for one more visit . 

My attempt at being the strong positive one was a poor mask. 

Ginny saw right through me and gave me a kiss

that I can still feel seventeen years later.It was the blessing I had not expected.

It was the kiss that exceeded the kiss of the Princess Bride. 

I was unaware just how much everything was about to change again. 

---------

The Writing:

A Metanoia Anniversary pt 17

"To Every thing there is a season, and 

a time for every purpose under heaven "

- Eccl. 3:2

Seventeen years ago today

The sacred heart band taught this troubadour 

What it means... to be.

Burned out working within the ivy walls

The student led the teacher..as it should be..

Fateful Ash Wednesday with nothing to lose

The collegial pastor marks the spot.

The retreating sun that day continued to mark a turn in 

The wandering pilgrim's road .

A late night phone call, an interview,

a cosmic intervention.

The sojourner introduced to a new world

where faith and work overlapped.

Ying and yang.

Time and the journey never stands still.

Pieces of the puzzle falling perfectly into place.

Another accidental encounter leads 

To a new invitation , a silent retreat.

The paralyzed prodigal was about to 

lowered into the holy presence.

The seeker then is recommended 

to a place of holy ground

within a stone's throw from his home.

There a guide to the spiritual realm continued to nourish

the prodigal's thirst and slow return.

The deep dive began as his worldly passage

begins spinning faster and faster.

Dizzied and heartache brings him to 

the expert in matters of the heart . 

The grand physician informs the lost soul

of his broken heart. A repair is urgent.

Hours before the chest being cracked open

the half hearted lost wanderer landed in the upper room

at the grace-filled place where those convened

placed there  their hands in Sacrament on the pilgrim. 

The healing, the transformation, the butterfly about

to break free into flight.

The heart repaired , ribs wired together.

The weak spark rekindled into flame-

Heart on fire , a metanoia being born.

Eyes are opened to see truth, purpose, compassion,

selflessness , peace , love  and faith.

Every thing , every moment , every encounter ,

every place , the words of inspiration and encouragement

through both the calm and stormy seas

was all that broken hungry heart  really needed.

Finisterre ... an ending - a beginning.

- JF Sobecki

--------

Poetry: some words and ideas to contemplate

(Please click on links underneath the video)

St. Ignatius' Day (8/2008)

Wel,it was St. Ignatius' Day

The presiding prelate put his hands on me

No words needed as the paralytic was lowered

Into the sanctified presence.

Immersed in the desire to be free

A proclaimed consecrated "exercise" 

was suggested by the advocate.

Slowly silently slipping away

When the the community gathered

That had filled the upper room 

Laid their hands on this frail worn creation.

A smudge of oil , spirit lifting higher and higher

Oh gentle intercessory prayers

It was St. Ignatius' Day

Fear need a dose.of love and

a confession of faith

Many demons to be slayed

No doubt they were real

Two standards recalled and contemplated

Simple choice 

Hold me, hold me don't let me fall

Within the deepest silence

a voice sings out for love echoes

falling into grace

Would this suffice?

Was my desire to please be

satisfactory for hope

I fell to my weakened knees

It was St. Ignatius' Day

Leading by being led

A lighthouse above the breaking waves

From the storms

Shining the great beacon on 

this fragile essence to 

the safety of the shoreline.

Disappointed with my doubt

Tears of joy - 

Pouring like eternal wine from a chalice

The prodigal pilgrim sanctified

From the abundant unconditional benevolence.

The lost vessel with filled with cosmic mercy,

consolations of peace while the 

fear washed away with the withdrawing tide.

Nourished by the solemn invocation,

Humbled and grateful

This wounded bird took to flight.

- JF Sobecki

For What Binds Us - J. Hirshfield

https://youtu.be/MQb5g5CISn4?si=W5FXRHS9RRe8p9xA

Life is a Walking - Good Buffalo Eagle

https://youtu.be/ZQYPlEoU9ko?si=5E8i-DZmhCzsS2Yl

----

Music: and such for your listening inspiration

Second Chances - G. A. Isakov

https://youtu.be/makCY8JSqgE?si=7OcM3izuwd1zUtGg

A Promise of Living - A. Copeland

https://youtu.be/bLM_YTnmLto?si=P1-W1B25CndmwjVk

One Fine Day - D. Byrne

https://youtu.be/JvlT5fBIi4U?si=alyDyJIDZQxWs5oK

-----

Coda: Some extras for your reflection

Field of Dreams - "Is there a  heaven?'

https://youtu.be/b_wnD6jxREU?si=pWu2d8CGnWr3e6ZW

(I'm not crying are you crying?)

Prayer- Beach Boys

https://youtu.be/X76ejh4EIV4?si=65-4YAWLRpejPaI4

A prayer of gratitude to all my "companions" I met

and continue to meet along the way.

!7 years since this Second Chance Dance Blog began to pour out.

AMDG

Copyright 2025 All Rights Reserved JF Sobecki LLC

    

The Art of Imperfect Perfection: The Retreat

The Art of Imperfect Perfection: The Retreat

"Be Perfect perfect as your Heavenly Father 

is perfect"

- Matt 5:48

"The wind blows where it wills, and you can

hear the sound it makes,

but you do not know where it comes from 

or where it goes."

- John 3:8-9

"Our real journey in life is the interior; it is a

matter of growth, deepening , and of an ever greater 

surrender to the creative action of love and grace in

our hearts. Never was it more necessary to that action."

- Thomas Merton

"There is another great difference between our civilization

and yours. You admire one who pushes their way to the top

in any walk of life , while we admire the one who abandons

their ego."( a Buddhist Monk)

- H. Harrer, Seven Years in Tibet

Inspiration 

It's been written that the origins of the word for "perfection"

can be found in the adjective in the Aramaic/Hebrew "Tamiym" 

from the root"Taman" meaning to "be complete" or "to be finished."

Many scholars suggest that in the New Testament Jesus' uses this word,

"tamin", intending to implore his followers on the importance of being

complete with personal character:  live life with integrity ;selfless;

and  compassion  in a covential  relationship with the divine and all creation.

The Writing :

The Art of Imperfect Perfection: The Retreat

The seeker's weather worn vessel carefully kept

on course , he believed, as storms came and went.

Winds of an unknown source filled his sails

directing him to the hidden-in-plain sight safe harbor. 

Sometimes seekers take careful steps and

sometimes they might take a leap. 

Seekers always looking for something to find.

Ulysses had nothing on this sailor.

His vessel finally arrived to what the local ascetics called-

"The Holy Ground." 

Seven days and six nights of silence and contemplation 

in solitude waited to welcome him into the mystic.

The resident stoic Obi-Wan , disguised 

as a humble spiritual sherpa, with a generous smile

welcomed and counseled the sojourner,

"It's just you and the great Divine , pal."

With no map or cosmic GPS

the seeker commenced his long solitary walks

amid the transcendental pastoral sanctuary.

The result ...fatigue...physical, mental

and spiritual. His new mantra grew to "What a waste

of time.I'm done. What a waste of time.

I'm done."...over and over and over.

By the third dawn of this retreat it was time for the seeker

to meet the typically candid unassuming advisor 

and informing him that he would withdraw 

from these spiritual exercises.

An aroma of fresh columbian coffee filled the new 

morning's air cut through the mist coated sanctorium .  

A fully awake enthusiastic dining room server

approached him with the fresh brew asking,

"Cup of hope?" The seeker smirked responding, 

"Yeh, sure . I can use all the hope I can get."

Within minutes he was proposing his conclusions to his spiritual

guide who just cracked that reverent smile.

"This is normal. Stay one more night. Tonight 

go for your after dinner walk, have your cigar and don't

think ...just let it go and be."

Though a strange proposition the seeker agreed.

As the sun shone it's last glimmer

lighting his post dinner cigar he moved a little slower and

more deliberately than normal through the bucolic pathways. 

Drifting lost in thoughts it hit him - "I'm lost!"

In a blink there were eyes curiously staring at him. 

Four deer within ten feet surrounded him 

in a sacramental semi circle.

A sound of silence of sanctified angelic voices 

found their way to his unsettled  spirit.

"Why are you worried? Don't you know you are blessed?'

Do you realize this is 'holy ground' , a sanctuary"?

Wiping the tears meandering down his cheek he realized

the deer had departed like that consecrated wind.

He scampered like a frightened  startled buck 

to the retreat house where he collared 

his spiritual sherpa explaining what had just occurred.

"Was it real? Was it a dream?"

The wise one looked up smiling gently touching the seeker .

"The deer have always been there .You didn't see them before 

because you were busy making a retreat and not allowing

the retreat to make you."

- JF Sobecki

--------------------------------

Words: Poetry and Such (for your Inspiration)

"Ring the bells that still can ring.Forget your perfect offering.

There's a crack in everything.That's how the light gets in.

 - L. Cohen , Anthem

The Buddha's Last Instruction

"Make of yourself;f a light,"said the Buddha

before he died.

I think of this every morning

as the east begins

to tear off its many clouds

of darkness , to send the first

signal - a white fan

streaked with pink and violet,

even green.

An old man. he lay down

between two lala trees,

and he might have said anything,

knowing it was his final hour.

The light burns upward,

it thickens and settles over the fields.

Around him, the villagers gathered

and stretched forward to listen.

Even before the sun itself

hangs, disattahced, in the blue air,

I am touched everywhere

by its ocean of yellow waves.

No doubt the thought of everything

that has happened in his eternal life.

And then I feel the sun itself

as it blazes over the hills,

like a million flowers on fire_

yet I feel myself turning

into some inexplicable value.

Slowly, beneath the branches,

he raised his head

He looked straight into the faces of the frightened crowd.

- M. Oliver

News of Death - David Whyte 

(for Francisco)

https://youtu.be/Lav7vWaLRSc?si=7pieYUYC_WKqPtyv

------

Music : for your listening pleasure and reflection

click on "links" below each picture for video and sound

I have need for Solitude - Mary Chapin Carpenter

https://youtu.be/S3ZMq24XnLk?si=W1HpOmWsPDvJ5xzj

Sail On - Mary Black

https://youtu.be/zv113_HGT60?si=Jo_p0WF3F2Lwaf3I

Awake My Should - Mumford and Sons & Milk Carton Kidds

https://youtu.be/I1V73Asi19U?si=C44QvYnRD9Lsp3e4

Anthem - L. Cohen 

https://youtu.be/c8-BT6y_wYg?si=ChDqww-rhjc6R-51

I Know There's an Answer - Beach Boys

https://youtu.be/9TfUo2Pg0Sg?si=uXN-wq2zCqu1vTDm

CODA: Now something from the lighter side 

( No thing and no one is perfect)

The Meaning of Life - Everyone Loves Raymond

https://youtu.be/FZb4jBE0Gr0?si=7ERyTgHUWin_aA7d

and from the serious side

Kundun - ( the Dalai Lama escapes Tibet

from the Chinese invasion- movie ending)

https://youtu.be/WB5Buz0MvZM?si=V-npWOvcOyjbi-0K

Remembering - 

There is an old joke about the Jesuits:

"A humble Jesuit? A Rarity. 

A Jesuit Pope? An Impossibility.

A humble Jesuit Pope? A miracle."

( & miracles happen)

When Pope Francis was asked how he hoped he would be remembered

he said, "A good guy who tried to do good."

"Be a Francis."

For Fr. Lou and all my companions and friends who have guided ,

inspired and walked with me on my Camino

AMDG

Copyright 2025 JF Sobecki LLC All Rights Reserved

The Art of Being and No Intention

 

"One life but we're not the same

we got to carry each other, carry each other.."

- U2

"I should be content

to look at a mountain

for what it is

and not as a comment on my life."

- David Ignatow

"We plan, God laughs" - Yiddish Proverb

A New Year's Plea

Lord, let me stand in the thick of the fight

Let me bear what I must without Whining

Grant me the wisdom to do what is right

Though a thousand false beacons are shining.

Let me be true as the steel of a blade

Make me bigger than skilled or clever:

Teach me to cling to my best, unafraid.

And, harken the false gospels, never.

Let me be brave when the burden is great,

Faithful when wounded by sorrow,

Teach me, when troubled. with patience to wait

The better and bright tomorrow.

Spare me from hatred and envy and shame,

Open my eyes to life's beauty:

Let not the glitter of fortune or fame

Blind me to what is my duty.

Let me be true to myself to the end,

Let me stand to my task without whining,

Let me be right as a man , as a friend,

Though a thousand false beacons are shining.

   - Edgar A. Guest ( found in a collection of his poetry printed 1925)

___________________

The Art of Being and No Intention

An original member of the band recalled how the pilgrim

Was thought of as the student  with "Aptitude with Attitude."

The "undeclared" pilgrim sojourner believed he was

That cork "floating over the raging sea,"

No course charted or a grand vision of Ulysses.

Often distracted, the pilgrim wandered this way and that,

Not considering how the wind and mystical currents -

Were taking him to be precisely where he needed to be.

On the inhale present to mystery , and

On the exhale the holy longing could fade as

Disorientation and discouraging doubt disrupt the passage.

Almost 28,000 rotations of the earth completed

Since that eternal spark launched his soul's innocent vessel,

From the womb fists ready for the fight, 

You know, just in case,

From the first light injustice and ignorance 

Appeared flourishing in all aspects of the world .

"Where was that unconditional love? 

What happened to the magnificent

Promise of perpetual sanctifying peace?'

No control while relying on faith 

Seemed at times to stop everything within and around him.

Then that secret sacred voice, without speaking ,

Simply and unabashedly penetrated his spirit.

"Let go and just be. You are the author of your own story

Remember 'The treasure is where your heart is' .

No matter where you are

Or what you do or say

It is how you love and serve others that matters."

 - JF Sobecki

____________________-

"Wherever you go there you are."

- Jon Kabat-Zinn

-------

A few musical pieces....       

The Boxer - Kraus, Colvin and Douglas (P. Simon)

(Thanks to Lou P. for the inspiration )

     https://youtu.be/N31AvYe6WUU

There is a Mountain - Donavan

https://youtu.be/zil3-EDye1g

                          

Nights in White Satin/Late Lament - Moody Blues

https://youtu.be/bwr7TUNmwqQ

One of These Days - N.Young

https://youtu.be/XtRTA4u5QkU

One - U2

https://youtu.be/ftjEcrrf7r0

One Fine Day - D. Byrne*

https://youtu.be/JvlT5fBIi4U

Simple Gifts - Yo-Yo Ma/Allison Kraus

https://youtu.be/baNueuDCue0

'Til I Die - Beach Boys ( B. Wilson)

https://youtu.be/87D8-rXTT0M

Night Riders Lament - JJ Walker

( Just because - for all those who follow their own spirit)

https://youtu.be/3wOrfKtAK2Y

Ulysses(ending) - Read by Dame Helen Mirren (Alfred Lord Tennyson)

https://youtu.be/aJb_zJbJ7FI

amdg

Copyright 2023 All Rights Reserved
JF Sobecki LLC *











* Quaker

Remembering to Remember: A Summer Sampler 2015

“Remembrance is a form of Meeting”

       - Kahil Gibran

A friend this summer spoke of “Remembering to remember.” Our cyberspace discussion explored the significance and sacredness of recalling those moments of peace, love, consolation, mercy , compassion , companionship , blessings and grace. Well, those are my words and how I recall the exchange. It is difficult to describe. Sometimes words do not suffice or maybe I am not skilled enough to conjure the words that would accurately represent the essence of that conversation with my friend or how we really feel when we are remembering any of those moments that make life a unique gratifying experience.

So, if I were to be assigned by some teacher to craft a short paper or presentation on the first summer living at the Jersey Shore I would fail . It is not that I can’t remember but rather that I remember so much and I can never say or write anything “short.” I can only think of a couple of alternatives… just to be quietly grateful and remember how blessed I am or , as the saying goes “a picture says a thousand words,” to post a sampler of a few photographs that  represent a select few of those blessed moments.

In My Life – The Beatles ( click on link)

http://youtu.be/UKQpRgxyyqo

I remember you - Tony Bennett (click on link)

http://youtu.be/Yslez7Ds0xM

Til I Die – Beach Boys ( click on link )

https://youtu.be/46IQu0yuJzU

 

amdg

Copyright 2015 JF Sobecki

The Way - A Reflection on Life Journeys

                              

                                      “You don't choose a life. You live one.”

                                                   - The Way (movie 2010)

                       “Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans.”

                                           -  “Beautiful Boy “, John Lennon

“What is it in many sentient beings that compel them to construct elaborate contrivances in order to maneuver themselves to form what they believe to be self- defined actualization? Often the perceived ambitious intention and step by step action plans contain a significant expectation of an achievement resulting in self serenity that in reality is rarely satisfying.”

                                             - Unknown

As a young boy I was asked to write a paragraph on where I saw myself in twenty years. Of course I wrote a few paragraphs. It was first person account of the musings of a truck driver with a job that took him from town to town around the country, a picaresque hero of sorts. Sister Bastinda wrote a note to my mother saying how that I needed a direction, a realistic goal and how I wasn’t living up to my potential, whatever that was.

The only real personal dream I had was when in high school was to play the guitar.I loved playing music. It was and still is a Zen experience for me, losing all sense of time as I played. (I have a similar experience now when I write.) Back then I fantasized that my friend, David, and I would be singing and playing our instruments on some family entertainment program on television, Actually, we asked our reliable Ouija board and it confirmed that we would someday be on TV. Still waiting.

Over the subsequent years I meandered the maze of education and career paths. Half listening to Frost’s choice of travelled roads and half listening to the Cheshire Cat’s retort to Alice’s query I took the path that seemed most interesting and adventurous at the time. It wasn’t until I met my Obe Wan, Kirk, who told me of his own accidental Odyssey that led him to becoming a medical doctor and eventual therapist. His Ulyssian episodes highlighted for me the power of being present and letting go as well as the importance of how we live while on the journey. What really mattered he said, “was how we responded to those we encountered, how we loved and lived with compassion and integrity.” My spiritual guide who advised on the Ignatian way of living as a loving grateful faith-filled contemplative in action complimented this counsel. I then added to my lesson mantra “never take myself too seriously.”

So it is no wonder about how upset I can get at times when I hear or see the great marketers preaching the promise that buying into their special unique goal and how achieving it will result in personal success as defined by them.

Though I never became a truck diver nor did I appear on TV playing my guitar I am grateful for the paths I followed, my family ,  people I have encountered, the places I have been…and the life I have lived…. so far.

Sub note: It is not unusual then that I like journey poems, books, songs and movies. I have often fantasized about taking a pilgrimage on the "El Amino de Santiago." Recently I saw a simple movie called “The Way” about a man’s journey down the El Camino de Santiago. It seemed coincidental that I saw this as I planned this blog post. 

The Journey by Mary Oliver

One day you finally knew

what you had to do, and began,

though the voices around you

kept shouting

their bad advice--

though the whole house

began to tremble

and you felt the old tug

at your ankles.

"Mend my life!"

each voice cried.

But you didn't stop.

You knew what you had to do,

though the wind pried

with its stiff fingers

at the very foundations,

though their melancholy

was terrible.

It was already late

enough, and a wild night,

and the road full of fallen

branches and stones.

But little by little,

as you left their voices behind,

the stars began to burn

through the sheets of clouds,

and there was a new voice

which you slowly

recognized as your own,

that kept you company

as you strode deeper and deeper

into the world,

determined to do

the only thing you could do--

determined to save

                                                           the only life you could save.

Edith Piaf - Non, je ne regrette rien ( Smart phones click on link)

https://youtu.be/fFtGfyruroU

‘Til I Die – Beach Boys ( Smart Phones click on link)

https://youtu.be/46IQu0yuJzU

The Way – Movie Trailer (Smart Phones click on link)

https://youtu.be/o5VZKWcgw6c

Lord Jesus, teach me to be generous; 
teach me to serve you as you deserve,
to give and not to count the cost,
to fight and not to heed the wounds,
to toil and not to seek for rest,
to labor and not to seek reward,
except that of knowing that I do your will.
Amen.  

 - St. Ignatius Loyola

amdg